clarkatroid is not folding

In the "normal" world, and i use the term normal because the poker world is crazy as toast, my profession was as a licencee, which i did for 15 years before buying my own gaff,  a local nightclub in March 2004.

But it turned out to be a huge mistake in retrospect. In 2005 the introduction of late licencing crippled my business, then a year later the nationwide smoking ban was a final sledge hammer to my nuts. My livelyhood was unavoidably collapsing after i had pumped my life savings into it.  Im not going lay total blame on these legal changes though as thats a cop out, and the reality was i probably wasnt up to the job. I thought i could make it successful and i didnt. And i still dont know why. And the failure still rankles me

Debts started to spiral out of control, and i was at the point where i was frightened to answer my phone or open mail. And im not exaggerating. There was mail piling up at the door, and unopened answerphone messages dating back 3 or 4 weeks. It was all bad news, there was no way out, and i couldnt face it. Folk ringing up demanding money, or red letters and court dates piling up  at the door. I was depressed, it wasnt supposed to happen this way.

This was the club...... with about as many people in it!

Id served my time for years learning my profession, worked under the best in the business (thats you Jackie "Mad Dog" ) , won company awards n' stuff, and now i was phoning bankruptcy agencies to see if i could save my house from the creditors. I was going into work and drinking too much as it was so damn depressing being in the building to start with. I hated being there.

Anyway, i digress. The point of mentioning all this of this misery is that i got out just in the nick of time, just as everything was coming to a head, just as my finances where going tits up out of control, i somehow managed to sell the business and the weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders over night. The sale went through at around the same time as my huge 144k poker scores.

I realise im drifting around a bit here with the story, but i dont think i can mention winning 144k in 3 big fat chunks, within 5 days, without giving it a little more respect than one nonchalent, passing sentence.

So heres my take on tourneys. They are time consuming, all of your time if your not disciplined. They can take over your life. At one point i was playing 14 hours a day starting with the pokerstars 10 buck donkashoot rebuy at 1pm, and finishing at 4 am if i ran deep in the 9pm rebuy. You are shallow stacked which means the skill edge is reduced as most the action is pre flop compared to cash poker, and you get soul crushing outdraws. Over and over.

But..........Theres no better feeling for a poker player, in any poker game, in any format, than running deep in a big money tourney. To most of us it happens so so so infrequently, this only highlights the tension and drama. It feels fantastic. The ride is amazing, breathtaking, you spend moments at the edge of your seat screaming, doing X factor style air grabs when your all in and hit an unexpected but helpful card. The buzz is incredible .You get your missus out of bed at 4am and shes doesnt mind! Its a special moment, youve won a shit ton of money, and theres a shit ton more money up for grabs in the next 60 minutes. And she knows it. Your poker bankroll, that youve been trying for years to build,  is imminently about to multiply by 10x 20x 100x!!!! Nothing in poker compares to having 2 million chips infront and playing heads up for the title. Nothing.

And lthough ive only played 1 mtt in 8 months, i would never say id given them up totally as my fond memories of those special moments are just too powerful to say never

Ok, now i got that out of my system, back in reality, its january 2007, i have a whopping $175k poker roll,  but im unemployed.

I worked out that i could grind like a bastard, 4 tabling 100 dollar sng 8 hours a day for 10 pounds an hour and pull £400 for a weeks work. A real shitty, shortsighted job, no prospects, and very unappealing, but i thought that would keep money coming in while looking for a proper career. Problem was, i was pig sick of the licenced trade and i never wanted to pull another pint every again either.

And I didnt want to play tourneys for a living as despite the excitement which only happens once in a blue moon, its a terrible, time consuming lifestyle where your annual income depends on winning a couple of coin flips deep in a big tourney. Plus i felt like id used up my luck in those games. No stability, and working the nightshift. No thanks. Not for me. Time to take the money and run as far as mtts where concerned

So i was at a crossroads in both real life and poker, my past efforts and experiences in both fields had no place in my future.

And all of the above waffle takes means the story hasnt progressed any since the end of my last post. Apologies for that

I decided to take 20k out of my roll and give cash poker a bash. I my bankroll was cash rich, and now was the time to do it.  I decided if i was going to do this properly, and 20k is a proper commitment, i had to immerse myself in it. So i banned myself from playing any sngs or tourneys for 3 months or until the 20k was busted

I played my first cash hand in summer of 2007, and jumped straight in "mass tabling" one 6 max table at 2/4 on pokerstars. No preparation, no poker tracker, no strategy, a proper virgin.............. and i loved it from day 1. 

The decision to divert from sng/tourney poker to cash is easily the most important poker decision ive ever made, but its also been the best career decision.